Louisa's Weight Loss Blog

It’s all TOP SECRET at the moment… but I have started taking a new weight loss pill and diet plan so that I can report back to Total Chunk readers at the end of the February about the product’s effectiveness.

Looking at the packaging, I’m not convinced or impressed with the product but I do hope for the sake of those who already take the diet pill that it does actually work!

Without giving too much away, it really does look like an expensive multivitamin – looking down the ingredient’s list it appears to be a list of vitamins with caffeine. When was a vitamin deficiency the root of weight gain?

Anyway, watch this space and I really do hope that I am wrong about this diet pill…

Last pictures of 2009 - Goodbye stomach!

Jonny and I met at the very end of 2008 so technically, even though our relationship blossomed throughout 2009, I accredit my luck at meeting such a sweet and lovely man to 2008.

This is because 2009 was mainly rubbish! I spent half of it unemployed and we almost lost my dad in June as a stupid doctor who I would like to poke in the eye, diagnosed acute appendicitis as wind. He’s ok now luckily but I will never forget the horror of seeing my daddy looking weak and forlorn in a hospital bed with a bile bag attached to a tube coming out of his nose. Cue various car problems and the destruction of our bicycles on a 70mph road on the way to Holland. We had hoped things would start to improve… until Jonny was made redundant just 3 days before Christmas which led to me saying “blow it, I’m going to enjoy Christmas and eat/drink what I want!”

The picture above was taken on New Year’s Eve 2009. As you can see, my waist and hips have expanded massively in the last year. What you can’t see is the thigh fat and that my once lovely bottom is becoming saggier and saggier as the days go by.

These are not the words of a paranoid young woman who is looking for compliments, these are the words of a woman desperate not to let herself go just yet! I don’t want to be one of those women who lament the fact that they hated the way they looked when they were young. I want to enjoy my 20’s and not go through my youth pretending that I don’t care about the belly I am starting to acquire.

Louisa aged 12 in Steel Band

Losing weight and looking good for my own benefit is important to me. I was an ugly and awkward child/teenager who was skinny and clumsy. Continually picked on by the jealous and insecure partly for how I looked and partly for having a mouthy sister, I struggled for years accepting my appearance.

Now I am a grown up, I have absolutely no interest in proving anything to people I used to go to school with. I want to get slim now before I let myself go and find myself needing to lose 100lbs in 2011! When I started blogging, I realised that my desire to lose 14lbs would seem ridiculous! I’ve read so many weight loss stories in the last few months and there are people out there who were desperate – they had to lose weight or they would die long before their time. This is why I changed direction and stopped writing about my diet and started writing dieting tips.

I would love to hear your dieting stories and any unusual diet tips you’ve found to work. Please reply in the comments or on the content page if you would like your achievment to be featured on Total Chunk – just like South Beach Steve

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Everything has an opposite, so the seven deadly dieting sins must do too, which is why I have had a go at writing about the seven heavenly dieting virtues.

This one has been a bit harder as it’s less applicable to dieting than the deadly sins (why are sins more interesting? Who knows!?) but work with me and I’ll try and make this post interesting and informative.

Thing is, the heavenly contrary virtues are a bit boring as they overlap a bit – so I’ve used artistic licence to combine the four cardinal virtues with three theological virtues.

Many people want to lose weight with the help of Jesus – type ‘lose weight with Jesus’ into Google and it returns over a million results which is rather incredible.

I’m not a religious woman but this post is definitely applicable to all dieters, whether they are determined Atheists or can’t get out of bed without saying a prayer.

Happy reading!

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The 7 deadly weight loss sins

Today I am going talk about the Seven Deadly Sins of Dieting. Deeply rooted in Catholic literature, the original seven deadly sins were gluttony, fornication, avarice, sorrow, wrath, acedia (restlessness), vanity and pride.

Dante’s ‘Divine Comedy’ remains on my must-read list but I have a few more books to read but I think it’s a group task, I feel as though I won’t appreciate it alone or without guidance!!

Anyway, Dante’s epic poem (written between 1308 and 1321) updated the original sins to what we are more familiar with today: gluttony, avarice, luxuria, acedia, wrath, envy and pride. However the Catholic church did away with luxuria (extravagance) and we now know (officially) the sins are: pride, avarice, envy, wrath, lust, gluttony, and sloth/acedia.

As dieters, we all are guilty of these sins but let’s remember that these ’sins’ do not mark the end of our quest for a slim and healthy figure. You don’t need to do a penance or repent and feel guilty. All we need to do is recognise that we have made a mistake and try and not do the same thing again. I’m also going to write about the 7 Heavenly virtues so look out for that.

Happy reading! (more…)

I read an awful lot of weight loss blogs in my evenings. You could say I am hungry for knowledge because I want to lose wight and I want to create a comprehensive website packed full of useful diet tips, product reviews and general information for dieters over the world to use. I want to hear other people’s stories because this is a community.

However, I get incredibly angry when I see rubbish like this published online. I do wonder if the moderator approved my comment, I wasn’t rude but I made my feelings clear, “advice” like this is of no use to the normal man or woman at home just trying to lose a few lbs. In this blog post, the writer says that we have the ‘hot’ part of our brains, the part that acts on instinct and then the ‘cold’ logical part. We can resist chocolate cake apparently, if we count to 10 and access the ‘cold’ part of our brain.

Could you resist chocolate cake by simply asking yourself if you need this when you really, really want it? Didn't think so!

I’ve not heard such rubbish in a long time as cravings can last hours and hours. It is irresponsible to suggest to people that it is as simple as counting to ten to avoid eating chocolate cake. ‘Information’ like this is bandied around by people with very little weight loss knowledge purely trying to increase their website’s content so they can rank in Google. Writers like this know absolutely nothing of value to the weight loss community and clog Google with rubbish so the most useful stuff doesn’t actually appear on the first page.

Ignorant posters like this simply end up contributing to obliterating self-esteem in the long term as people feel weak for giving in and bumpf like this generally creates the idea among the weight loss newbies that ignoring cravings is easy. IT IS NOT! Weight loss is hard work, remember what your mum always said: “Nothing worth having ever comes easily.”

The author clearly does not understand how strong cravings for particular foods can be. I’ve heard of people driving miles and miles just to buy a particular kind of cake! If I told someone willing to drive 10 miles for cake to count to 10, close their eyes and breathe deeply or ask themselves if they really want the cake and I would fully expect a slap in the face and I would feel it was richly deserved too!

By the way, I’ve driven for 8 miles to a specific bakery for a particular kind of cake and another 12 miles back home after I found out they were closed and stopped to my 2nd choice on the way home. I know that telling people to access the ‘cold’ part of their brain is b*****ks!

When a relationship ends, you may certainly be heartbroken. It is normal to cry and need a comforting hug from your friends and family, fun drinking sessions with friends and so on to forget about the emotional pain. The thing is that most people cannot get to the fun stage until they have finished the ‘wallowing’ stage and this is where the Heartbreak Diet comes in. We have all been there and most women will support you and try and help you by telling you of their experiences and how they got through it. You will get over it and you will meet someone nice again. I didn’t meet anyone remotely nice until Jonny came along which was three years after my last relationship!

Most women will be familiar with the Heartbreak Diet and it can go one of two ways.

• Some women won’t want to eat at all. They will only eat when forced and each mouthful of food sticks in the throat and you always feel sick afterwards. Normal eating will usually resume after a few weeks but women who have lost weight as a result will typically be thrilled with their new bodies and will work hard to maintain their new weight.
• Other women will turn to food for comfort and can’t stop eating. They will put on weight and may spiral into depression and feelings of low self-esteem.

When your heart is broken, you will either turn to food for comfort... or turn away from it.

There are ways around the unfortunate second option if you believe you may fall into this trap.

• Surround yourself with mates and maybe eat with them too. Cook healthy meals for each other and go to exercise or dance classes together.
• Keep your self esteem up, stay busy and treat yourself regularly with small gifts that aren’t food.
• Join the gym, spend all the time you would have spent with him exercising and working for the body you always wanted.

I have really been getting into X factor over the last couple of weeks. I’ve found the live shows really exciting and nerve wracking at times. I HATE the twins with every fibre of my being! They are certainly amusing but that isn’t good enough for a talent contest when there are so many talented singers who would give their right arm for such an amazing opportunity. Then they’re wasting it d***ing around in red PVC jackets! What I do know is that Ricky had a few more weeks left in him and he was cruelly sacrificed by the voting public. I’ve just been watching the new Sunday show and it’s been so nerve wracking i’ve been snacking on doritos with hot salsa. Oops.

Miss Frank are brilliant but the pressure will be on to lose weight

I’m not sure who I think will win yet but I do like Louis’ act Miss Frank. They are fresh, sassy and fabulous! However, they are hardly the image of a typical girl band and I believe that if they wish to pursue a career after X factor, they will have to reassess their image. They were incredible last night but the girls are on the chunky side and most record companies would have them agree to go on a diet as a part of their contract. My advice to the girls if they choose to lose weight (and anyone undertaking a job that requires a lot of energy to get through the day) would be to not rely on sugar to keep your energy levels up. Avoid refined sugar like the plague! Caffeine in black coffee has its benefits but should not be relied upon to keep you awake beyond your natural capabilities. Indulge in brown rice and lots of high-fibre  filling vegetables that give you bundles of energy. The GI diet is great for giving dieters plenty of energy although it is a lot of effort to prepare every meal. They will need this wholesome energy to cope with demanding dance routines and a hectic schedule.

Total Chunk Top Tip: If like X Factor act Miss Frank you may be embarking upon a hectic lifestyle and you want to lose weight, do not rely on sugar and caffeine to keep your energy levels up. Try the GI diet as a way of getting lots of energy released slowly over the day.

I have been too busy with my new job and my philosophy exam to update Total Chunk this week but do not fear, I am back for good. All my good intentions went to hell and losing weight has been the last thing on my mind… so much so, that I ate a huge amount of cake this evening because I really didn’t know what else to do!

Anyway, just because I have been cramming knowledge in for my exam (it was on Wednesday) it doesn’t mean I haven’t been bursting with ideas for my beloved weight loss blog.

Today’s topic is detox diets. Celebrities such as Carol Vorderman will have you believe that they are the best thing since sliced bread. I can reveal here and now that there is actually no medical basis for such rave reviews.

Water is a natural detox on its own merit but too much is harmful

Don’t get me wrong, a detox diet will not harm you if you only follow it for a couple of days. Unfortunately, people are drawn in to undertaking potentially dangerous diets with false promises of weight loss. If you restrict your diet to 500 calories a day or less, you will of course lose weight on a detox diet. You will however, not be getting the nutrients you need to keep your immune system up and if you participate in a low calorie, high plant intake diet your body could go into starvation mode. When your body goes into starvation mode, you will hold on to fat as your body will try to conserve it for as long as possible for energy. Detox diets also have a high water intake and last year, a woman died as a result of drinking too much water. Water poisoning can happen to anyone of any age, health status etc. The water dilutes the salt your body needs to function and as a result your brain will swell and you could suffer potentially devastating consequences such as brain damage.

The truth is that you do not need to detox your body. Your liver and kidneys do the bulk of the filtering out of toxins with no outside assistance and rarely do they actually NEED it. You might feel ‘cleaner’ after three days of ‘detoxing’ but the likelihood is that you will be tired and lacking energy from a lack of protein and carbohydrate.  You will also probably gain more weight than you lost over the few days as your body is trying to regulate itself. When you are dieting, consistency is the key!

I also strongly believe that there is no need to detox using enemas regularly as this encourages your excretory system to become lazy. So when you stop using them, you could certainly find it hard to have a natural bowel movement. If you ask your doctor, I expect you will be given the same advice.

Total Chunk Top Tip: Detox diets will not help you lose weight as a part of a long-term solution as your body will find it hard to regulate itself and you may gain weight. If you feel compelled to detox, do not participate for longer than three days and be careful about your water intake as too much can be very harmful.